I agree with Nick

Don't let the fact that Nick Clegg, Tony Robinson and other assorted nauseating pond-dwellers are leading the charge for a "yes" vote in the AV referendum put you off.

If the "no" camp win, that will be electoral reform off the political agenda and the Labour-Tory Buggins' Turn arrangement the UK has got used to over the last 80 years entrenched for another generation.

I'm not going to repeat my previous argument. And tempting as it is to engage with the lunatic nonsense being spouted by both sides – although there's rather more on the "no" side – I won't. I'll just give a link to the Yes campaign then get back to what you're all here for – my opinion.

If AV is good enough for both Labour and the Tories (kind of) to elect their leaders with, why is it too complicated or too likely to lead to extremists being represented for you and me?

If it is good enough for Northern Ireland, why is it wrong for England, Scotland and Wales?

AV is far from perfect, but it's a step in the right direction – that is, towards a species of democracy that aspires to some kind of pluralism in representation.

More importantly, the symbolic importance of slapping the Westminster establishment around its bewhiskered purple chops cannot be overstated.

There's nothing sacred about first-past-the-post, just as there's nothing inherently right or democratic about one party having a monopoly of government.

It's precisely because people are sick of the Tory-Labour cycle and the lack of choice and real representation it provides that first-past-the-post threw up a result last May where no one won. You think that was a one-off? You don't think that's a reflection of long-term changes in political affiliations?

The country, the state, belong to the electorate – not the politicians.

The electoral system is the petri dish in which the current culture of political bacteria developed. Let's squirt some Toilet Duck into it on May 5^th.

PS – I recycled the idea for the photo from here. Can't claim any credit for that beyond working out how to use MS Paint to change the numbers round...

Keep it simple

There's a reason why gyms play crappy dance music all the time. Originally, I believed that it was because gyms were overwhelmingly populated by the sort of halfwits who like music like that.

That is, the same reason why there's always more TVs in there showing ITV1 than any other channel.

I have since revised my opinion, at least in part. While I still consider the above to be true, I have also found that it is extremely difficult to do any kind of cardiovascular exercise while listening to – for example – free jazz.

Anything that lacks a simple, thumping 2/4 or 4/4 beat is really bloody hard to get your breathing and running (or rowing or cycling or...errrr...climbing an imaginary Sisyphean staircase) in time with.

Tempo changes cause me to trip over my feet and get a stitch. I hyperventilate at polyrhythms.

Unless you have seven legs and lungs the size of spacehoppers, I strongly discourage you from attempting to jog while listening to any of Miles Davis' output from the 1970s. I tried it, and I swear that after 25 minutes I could really see the 666 embossed on Jeremy Kyle's forehead.

Like I say, there's a reason they don't play fusion in there.

The most self-indulgent thing I will ever write

I used to think that writing a blog was like walking into the middle of a busy shopping centre and shouting "look at me!" Now I realise it's like walking into the middle of a deserted shopping centre and shouting "look at me!"

I set this blog up 18 months before I wrote anything on it. Part of the reason for that was a perfectionism I think it's pretty obvious I have since abandoned. My "rationale" - if it deserves such a name - was that if it wasn't going to be immediately the biggest and best thing out there, I didn't want to put my name to it – even if it was a made-up name.

People who know me may recognise this "I won't play if I can't win" attitude. That, dear friends, is a recipe for doing nothing at all, and – I confess – for coming across like a bit of a wanker.

While there are things I've posted about that I am already fairly embarrassed about, there are likewise some pieces I'm quite pleased with – even if by far the most popular thing I've written was about Peppa Pig.

What, then, is this blog about? Let me begin by telling you what it's not.

I'm not trying to paint an accurate portrayal of myself and my life. I'm not trying to be thorough. I'm not trying to be fair to all sides of every argument. I write under a pseudonym because that's what I would want to produce if I was putting my name to this publicly. And I can't. Not without practice.

Most of what's on here is a first draft with minor tidy-ups carried out afterwards. Those tidy-ups probably constitute 25 per cent of the visits to the site. Another 25 per cent is me visiting to look at the stat counter.

It's about whatever comes into my head, for better or for worse. Why? Because I can. I know that in the big scheme of things this is about as worthwhile as scribbling on a pub toilet wall. But I enjoy it.

I hope that readers who know me personally will recognise me behind "Roger of Sicily", and get an extra layer out of what I post from the context.

Conversely, I hope that "Roger of Sicily" as exposed in purely what I write is funny enough, interesting enough or irritating enough to offer some kind of entertainment to strangers.

So in essence, Roger of Sicily is a wig, a fake moustache and a plastic nose I go about in on the internet.

Anyway, I do invite you all to leave comments here. All you need is a Google username (I've got some standards dammit!), and even if you say you don't like it, any attention at all strokes my colossal vanity.

And I promise not to write anything like this ever again.

Osteopaths and undertakers

I work in a real "here today, gone tomorrow" business: SEO.

You'll no doubt be glad - if you know anything about that benighted industry - that I hereby promise never to write about SEO on my blog.

Nor will I post links to other people's posts saying "this is interesting" in the mistaken belief that this makes me erudite by association.

In this field of activity, you have to constantly change what you're doing to adjust to the internet's ever-evolving standards. The wayside is strewn with the bodies of companies that didn't do that.

And if Google ever got sick of us, well, they've pretty much got the power to shut the whole sector down overnight.

In my dreams, this happens.

Last night, I went to the osteopath. Turns out I have lordosis and bad posture, which is causing me lower back pain.

A mauling later, it occurred to me that dealing with back pain has got to be right up there with undertakers and insolvency practitioners as one line of work that is never going to be short of customers.

More and more of us spend upward of 40 hours a week sitting at PCs at work, and then spend a good portion of the time we're at home sitting at PCs or other screen-based media.

We get our exercise going to gyms which encourage us to do everything wrong – by loading more and more weight onto machines without regard to technique. As such, we're probably using completely the wrong muscles to lift it by any means necessary.

I suppose there are members of staff there who are supposed to help you... well, at my gym they all just stand around talking to each other and making the customer feel bad about themselves. Maybe it's different elsewhere.

Plus, when you go to the gym, typically you'll do something completely destructive – like go in and wildly overwork some muscles you never use, then be laid up for two weeks getting over it. Alternatively, you come out and scoff double the calories you've just burned off because you think you've earned it.

And when I say "we", "us" and "you", I mean of course "me". This blog is all about me.

I've always found people with "bad backs" who have not worked in coal mining or stone quarrying or otherwise actually injured themselves a little bit contemptible. Now I'm on the brink of turning into one of them.

I hereby commit to sorting out my posture. If any of you see me slouching, prod me sharply. And if I can't manage that, I'm going to retrain and become an osteopath – an osteopath whose website is number one in Google.

A reet Yorkshire day out

Last Sunday, the family and I went on an outing to Settle in the Dales.

Here is the receipt showing what we had to eat. How much more Yorkshire can you get than that?

Leaving aside the peculiarity of the name "Ye Olde Naked Man Cafe"- an establishment dating back to the 1660s, when presumably it was acceptable to naked and old in the north of England - it was a fine day out. Thankfully, Roger Jr did not ask what a naked man is.

Despite being Lincolnshire folk originally, and moving up here from Surrey, we are adapting quickly to Yorkshire habits. We have a whippet. I wear a flat cap. I inhaled sharply when I saw the price of Sheep Biscuits.

In the words of Victoria Wood, "You may not be from Yorkshire, but you're just as boring as if you were". That's us.

We have yet, however, to take some things, like Rugby League, "breadcakes" and casual racism into our hearts.

I still find it shocking when complete strangers (most recently an estate agent) throw complaints about "The Asians" into conversation. Have I got a racist-looking face? Perhaps there are some things - like Lincs' own stuffed chine - you have to be a native to appreciate.

Anyway, old naked men notwithstanding, Settle is a lovely little town which I'd recommend to anyone. I've never seen such a concentration of hardware stores in such a small area.

And if you need any "Bottogas", well Dugdales is the place for you.

Come on, I know it's from the '50s or earlier, but the name "Bottogas" would have suggested farting to Queen Victoria, let alone anyone in the present day.