My Vasectomy - Part 2

I had not planned on writing about this again so soon – I had expected to have at least a few weeks to forget about it before having to face the reality of what I have let myself in for.

But thanks to “a cancellation” they have got room to squeeze me in for my vasectomy THIS SATURDAY.

When they asked me if I wanted the place last Friday, I wouldn’t say I jumped at the opportunity – but the prospect of getting it over with more quickly, even at the expense of narrative pacing, was as appealing as anything concerned with bollock surgery feasibly could be.

I must confess, readers, I am feeling slightly less bullish about the whole thing than I was at the last time of writing, when I expected a good old 16-week NHS waiting list. But I have a sneaking suspicion that would have been the case whenever the date got confirmed. 

Between now and then, I have to figure out exactly how to comply with this red-ink-and-italics command printed on the letter:

Please shave the scrotal area (testicles) on the day of surgery, in particular on top of the testicles.

So, Saturday will see me do two things I've never done before! Thanks for repeating the word “testicles” in the course of that sentence, by the way. It had almost slipped my mind that they were involved. Still, at least I won't just be sat around all morning waiting - I will have a challenge to occupy me. 

And now if you will excuse me, the dog has something I am going to need...